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Being a cat lover myself… I might ask you to consider this… “MY” cat… it was never really yours, you just were lucky enough to have Shadow in your life for a time… I'm certain Shadow still visits you…maybe not as a physical being, but a being of light and love. Pay attention to and look for physical manifestations of Shadow… maybe like a brush past your leg…
Blessings,
Kris : )
You know, Kris, I have told myself the same thing: I was extremely fortunate to have this cat sit down on my lap when I walked into a shelter 7 years ago. He sat down and claimed me. Maybe he wasn't my cat, but I was his person. And I'm sure at some point in the near future I'll no longer feel this distraught. But grief is grief, and, honestly, I can't remember the last time I hurt this bad. (Probably a pregnancy that went wrong for my wife and I.) And, as you also suggested, I'm sure that he's still there in terms of the huge love force that he was. Two nights ago I did feel him in a dream, coming up and nuzzling me and I was so incredibly happy to see him.
I'm kind of a mess about this. Thanks for listening.
OMG - just this past summer my little black and white cat “Little Miss” passed away… She was so sweet and even in her older years still looked like a kitten. I was actually sitting at my computer and heard this really awful sound only to find Little Miss taking her last breath… Grief takes a while… It will be interesting to see what window opens up for you… Usually in times of loss a window of opportunity/gift is received.
I am indeed sorry for your loss and the misfortune with your wife's pregnancy.
May the suns rays fill your heart with love : )
Kris